Grown Ups 2

Cast of Characters:

Lenny Feder - Adam Sandler

Eric Lamonsoff - Kevin James

Kurt McKenzie - Chris Rock

Marcus "Higgy" Higgins - David Spade

Roxanne Feder - Salma Hayek

Deanne McKenzie - Maya Rudolph

Sally Lamonsoff - Maria Bello

Nick Hilliard - Nick Swardson

Director - Dennis Dugan

Screenplay - Fred Wolf, Adam Sandler & Tim Herlihy

Rated PG-13 for crude and suggestive content, language and some male rear nudity


      Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade and Rob Schneider team up again in the sequel Grown Ups 2. Wait, hold on. Schneider isn't in it? Maybe there is hope for this film.

      Grown Ups 2 picks up three years after the events of Grown Ups. The Feder family, led by Lenny (Adam Sandler) and Roxanne (Salma Hayek) have now moved back to Lenny's hometown. Meanwhile, Eric Lamonsoff (Kevin James) and his wife Sally (Maria Bello) are still dealing with their idiot child who seems unable to literally put two and two together. Kurt McKenzie (Chris Rock) and his wife Deanne (Maya Rudolph) are celebrating their 20th anniversary, despite Deanna forgetting (That means unlimited sex whenever, wherever, my man!), and Marcus Higgins (David Spade) just found out that he had a child - now a senior, as well as a dickhead, in high school - from a long gone girlfriend.

      It's the last day of school for the kids, so while they're finishing up the school year Lenny, Eric, Kurt and Marcus get together for some wild and crazy shenanigans that involve stealing a school bus and being forced to jump off a cliff and into a lake naked. Move over, Tarantino and David O. Russell. This writing has Oscar written all over it.

      So as I said at the beginning, maybe there is hope for this film with Schneider out. In a word, no. No, there isn't. Well, I take that back. If you just so happen to laugh when I say the following words - poop, pee, poop again, fart, burpsnart (a burp followed by a sneeze, then a fart), deer go pee-pee, poop once again, fart once again, crotch-kicking, ass kicking, hey, what the hell, poop again. Poop. Poop. Poop! Poopy! - you'll probably love this film. That, in a nutshell, is essentially what the humor boils down to here. Well, that and Shaquille O'Neal as cop... that pees in a pool. There's also a scene involving Colin Quinn working on an ice cream vending machine in such a way that resembles him pooping. Get it? It's chocolate frozen yogurt, but - get this - it looks like poop! Oh, yeah, I definitely take back what I said about This Is the End. This is the funniest movie of the year. Mel Brooks would be so proud. There's absolutely no effort at all to make the humor even remotely smart or witty. Most of the film just consists of various Sandler buddies, former SNL stars and Steve "Stone Cold" Austin popping up every now and then onscreen. Save a few moments from Taylor Lautner as a douchy frat boy that are actually pretty funny, the film goes nowhere... and I really mean nowhere. I'm all for goofball humor. There was a time when the Farrelly brothers were geniuses at it, but it was goofy humor that was smart in its own odd way. Here it got to the point where I felt awkward sitting in the theater not laughing while everyone else was just yucking it up. "Hmm... I better start laughing before people start to take notice.", I thought to myself. Then again, you know there was someone else in the theater laughing their ass off, but then thinking, "I'm laughing too much. People might start to take notice that I'm laughing at nothing." Eventually, I got so bored with this horrible movie I just admired Salma Hayek for the remainder of the film. That's a good substitute.

      A part of me wonders why the hell Sandler does movies like these. I've mentioned before with movies like Punch-Drunk Love, Spanglish, Funny People and even Anger Management, Sandler can make great movies if he puts the effort into it. Most of the time though, he doesn't 'cause unfortunately people don't flock to films of his like Spanglish or Funny People or Punch-Drunk Love 'cause they're too busy flocking to bull shit like this. It's just lazy bull shit poop, fart and crotch-kick humor. I know Sandler can do better, and I hope he does 'cause the movies I mentioned show he's capable of great things. He just doesn't bother with the effort. I give Grown Ups 2 a D+ (★½).